Well I put off my laundry and now I am paying for it by having to stay up late to finish it so I can sleep in tomorrow a little bit.

Skip the next paragraph if you don't want to hear me whine... :-)

Jessi just came in and talked to me about her guy problems. Me and her are so similar when it comes to that. We take the friends approach and the guys love us as friends... but nothing more. :-( And all I can do is keep frowning whenever I think about it. Sometimes I just go "Meh. Whatever, no biggie." But then I realize I'm in my third year of college and still not one single relationship. And... it sucks. I'm not sure what is wrong with me. Maybe I am too picky. Maybe I am choosing the wrong peopple to like. Or maybe I am destined to be a spinster. And what I hate even more is that this topic consumes me as much as it does lately. It makes me feel so weak. And I hate to feel weak. I keep telling myself, don't like anyone and just focus on yourself. But I find myself not doing that. I know that whatever I think or whoever I might be interested in or whatever I may be feeling will most likely lead to nowhere so why even bother. FUCK. See. I hate that. That down on your self esteem vibe I get from myself. It's so friggin' lame. I am not that person. I need to really get off this groove. I need to be able to be friends with this guy without wondering anymore than that. It doesn't matter anyways... I'm going away in a few weeks and then summer and then yup. And he is probably not right for me anyways... right? Right? Agh! Get a grip Vonda. Focus on friends. School. Home. Fun. Lots and lots of fun.

I feel really overwhelmed lately with all my work. ID 2050 is picking up a lot and I am doing so many activities and so many meetings and the other two classes aren't cake walks either all the time. Sometimes I really wonder how I manage to do it all and not cry at least once a day or something. But I really can't drop anything... can't drop AGD or SocComm or RAing or ID 2050 or MA 3457 or MG 3600 or SNAP. At least next year I will be minus the RAing. That will be a load off. I think I have reconsidered on the office thing in AGD. I always do this. I say I won't take an office and then completely change my mind. I think I want Ritual. It's my favorite part about AGD and I'll be a senior and yeah... Ritual. :-)

The AGD Retreat was tonight. Lots of fun. :-) I really do love being an Alpha Gam. Plus the naked pillow fights are ridiculously fun! ;-)

SocComm Retreat is tomorrow. I hope it is super fun. I am excited because I get to hang out with some of my favorite people - William, Laura, Drew (all future roomies), Bertini :-), and the rest of the awesome SocComm gang. The last retreat was where I got my nickname McBoobs. Let's see what happens this time. I am pretty excited. :-)

OK laundry should be done in a little bit. Then bed. I want a good dream.